Where's Your Faith?- Christianity and Beyond-15 minute read

I was raised Methodist. We didn’t attend church every single Sunday but the effort to go as often as we could was present. I can assume my church upbringing wasn’t too far off from many others within the Christian faith. As a small child, I went to Sunday school, received age appropriate lessons about God and Jesus Christ, had that Sunday school snack of that red fruit punch & cookies. Yall know what cookies I’m talking about. When Easter came around, church was unusually packed with people wearing their new outfits with people that you wouldn’t see again until either Christmas or next Easter. During Christmas, the traditional songs were sung and plays were performed by children of the church portraying Jesus in a manger in an inn with the 3 wise men coming, bearing gifts for the new King! And throughout the holiday season, Jesus is the reason for the season. A little girl born and raised in Mobile, Alabama, where the last slave ship arrived, is really where my faith walk began, with my ancestors.

There is much I remember about my faith journey as a young child, & then there is so much I really don’t recall. My mother, from time to time, would visit other churches but we always found our way back to Bethel AME. As I grew older into my teens, I don’t recall asking many questions regarding being saved. I, more or less, assumed I shouldn’t ask questions, as I was told that it was sinful to question God. So I never really questioned the faith I practiced. I practiced it because, well, my mom did, tradition if you will. The main thing I was to ensure I knew was about being saved.

There were other things I knew that I assume people would consider general knowledge, however at a certain age, in my younger years I would find myself feeling like I needed to be something I wasn’t because of my faith & in addition to that, I got to observe in real time folks who were “in the church” pretend to be something that they weren’t . I began to have questions as I started to notice the world outside of myself & my family, reality, & how people, specifically those“in the church” were not exactly conducting themselves accordingly to what I had learned you were supposed to as stated in the Bible. As I grew older, I began to understand that, simply put, we are all human, & that you probably won’t be condemned to hell due to a divorce or even an abortion. And if you are holding fast in this thinking as a Christian, then you’ve misinterpreted the Bible somewhere. I mean, Jesus does forgive us if we repent, right? People can & have sincerely evolved.

As I matured into adulthood, I was fairly proactive in ensuring I did my due diligence to maintain my spiritual well being; going to church, reading the word, attempting to live life according to what is pleasing to God. But I am no Bible scholar and far from a saint. After many years and observing people’s behavior who claimed they were saved, I went from judging people & calling them hypocrites to understanding we are all human & that I needed Jesus in my life just as any other individual, as far I understood.

It’s funny because, when I met my husband, who is Catholic, I knew eventually I’d convert over to Catholicism. I mean I was raised in a way that the household is supposed to operate under 1 faith, to not be unequally yoked. However, as I begin on that particular journey, I began to have inquiries about, well, the Bible. I wasn’t sure what I was searching for but I knew I was being led on a path much bigger than I thought I was ready for. I have always felt there was something much bigger than what I was shown growing up. My husband has been my anchor through my spiritual journey. He is very fact based & when I am wrong about a thing, he is real quick to correct me. Not because he’s being an ass, but he wants to ensure I am moving forward with correct information so I don’t trip my own self up. Ivan has been very grounding while I am on this journey. He has enabled me & given me the ability to manuever & find my own way in my path without ridicule.

Now before I go any further, I am well aware people will read this and instantly judge me(the irony), thinking I’m a lost soul, or I’m somehow possessed, or I’m doomed for hell due to their perceived notion that I lack faith in God. But on the contrary! My faith has been strengthened! I feel more confident in my exploration! I feel more grounded as a result of my exploration and my continued growth in knowledge. I feel more receptive to the Spirit of God. What I want to make clear is that there has never been a break in my belief in God and there is no break now. I am here & wouldn’t be who I am if it weren’t for God. I am well aware I am blessed beyond my wildest dreams, even on my lowest of days.

In fact, I intend to continue to recognize Christianity to facilitate my own continued growth. I stand firm in my understanding of the scriptures & Christianity. However, deep down I began to feel there is much more. I knew there was much more to religion/spirituality. As my understanding would have it currently, Christianity, as a social institution, practiced in the U.S., is limiting. As a means of conforming social behavior & not encouraging increased spiritual exploration. We are taught as young ones to not question what’s being instilled in us spiritually and we carry this same mindset into adulthood. Being called to embark on a spiritual journey that may be outside of what you were raised on can be a challenging journey to accept and begin & can also make you doubt yourself, make you feel like you are making a mistake. More often than not, once you begin to vocalize questioning something outside of what the majority of those you relate with believe, you can anticipate to be called evil or people will try to sow fear into your journey disguising it as love.

What I have come to learn is that many people are unknowingly operating out of tradition and/or in fear within Christianity and don’t even realize it. People will instill fear in others who don’t believe what they believe & THAT is actually hindering other people’s intended spiritual path. I am aware that there are people who feel what I feel, who seek what I seek & are afraid to engage in conversations of this topic for fear of being looked down on or being called evil or shunned. But rest assured, no matter your faith practices, your spiritual walk is yours and yours alone. So it really doesn’t matter what anyone thinks anyway. We often care way too much what others think out of the need to feel accepted, and for an extremely long time and somewhat still, this was/is me.(it’s getting better though) But I assure you, as you grow deeper in your own path, your need of acceptance from others in this capacity will greatly diminish, mainly because you have tapped into something that has made you stronger spiritually & your dependence on acceptance of others will decrease. Let me make this abundantly clear…You do NOT OWE ANYONE an explanation for your faith walk. If anyone is unwilling to be supportive in whatever capacity you might possibly need, then mind the company you keep and surround yourself with a support system that will assist your growth, not discourage it.

With regards to our references and resources, I think it is safe to say & common knowledge to know that the Protestant denominations that use the KJV or various editions of the Bible have the 66 books we have all grown to know. Within the Catholic faith, there are 73 books within that faith’s Bible. In the Greek Orthodox Bible, there are 79 and within the Ethiopic Bible, there are 88. You also have other traditions that only use 6 books of the Bible! We have to be a people who are ok with asking uncomfortable questions, especially when it comes to our faith. If you are willing to discount the known facts above, you are willfully stifling your own spiritual journey, in my opinion, of course. I mentioned in my introduction of my blog that some things may be challenging to discuss. Well, this topic isn’t that challenging for me to discuss but others may raise an eyebrow about this topic. And well…I’m ok with that. I’m ok with that because I understand the faith in my spiritual journey will sustain me, no matter how I choose to express or practice it. I know there’s more to the Bible than the 66 books I was raised on & continued to study into my adulthood & that alone gave me pause. Ask yourself, in addition to how our ancestors began to practice Christianity, how the current day Bible came to be. It was cherry picked & if you know this, your next question should be why. If your response to this is “you just need to believe”, this conversation isn’t meant for you. Think of it as how the public schools systems in the United States greatly whitewash black history. Many of us have taken the responsibility to dive deeper into our history that we KNOW was not & is not currently taught in schools. What makes you think the same thing has not been done with regards to Christianity & how it became the primary faith practice within the black community in the U.S.?

This book is an awesome read & clearly defines the similarities between Buddhism and Christianity.

Who are we to tell another group of people that what they believe spiritually is wrong? How do we know the faith practices we’ve held true to our entire lives is actually accurate? Have you done the research, the work, to qualify your perspective or taken the time to understand how black folks in our country came to practice Christianity? Or are you just blindly believing? That last question is tricky because it states in the Bible we are to walk by faith, not by sight, while also stating My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.

I know that I will get some raised eyebrows & maybe even some people who will choose to lessen their communications with me after this post. But there is beauty in truth and distractions taking care of themselves. While having only just begun this walk, I know that I am & will always diligently be a respecter of all faiths & it is safe to say that no matter whom you know that may practice a different faith than you, we are all trying to get to the same place. You just have to be willing to open up your mind and heart to believe that. You believing that Christianity is a superior religion is like white folks believing they are a superior race…and we know that ain’t true.

My very first mala, prayer beads I made-stones of howelite, garnet and the tree of life

If you haven’t figured it out, Buddhism is where I’ve been led to. This particular spiritual philosophy resonates more with what has been speaking to my heart. Now I feel I need to bridge 2 things I’ve pointed out. My current faith journey didn’t begin with my parents, entirely. It began with my ancestors who were brought here from West Africa. Well how does Buddhism even fit in? Eh…with the Yoruba faith there are more similarities with Buddhism than Christianity from the research I’ve done thus far but I still know very little otherwise about Yoruba faith, yet! I'm not abandoning my original faith of Christianity, but becoming more in tune with my ancestoral past open to exploring knowing Christianity is a religion that forced upon us as slaves. I understand when people get to this part, a sense of denial may ensue. But denying who we are does not change the fabric of our truest nature, our truest selves & we can't change the fact that Christianity was a force religion unto us. Research tells us that the main faiths practiced in West Africa before we arrived here in the U.S. were Islam & Yoruba. In Christianity as black people practice, you can still see the residual practices of our ancestors in how we worship today. I believe in today’s climate, there is more opportunity to explore & rwconmect to our actual past to further explore the truest nature of our original faith practices & simply who we were, who we are. Now back to my original thought, I would like to point out, oddly enough, Buddhism and Christianity are quite similar as well. From a more superficial layer( I say that not as a derogatory phrase),Christianity has its main book of reference, the Bible & has prayers, verses of scriptures to recite that we are to hide within our hearts. Buddhism has it equivalent book the sutras, the Pali Canon, depending on the tradition you practice, prayers and meditations & scriptures. Christianity has many symbolic features within its faith, Jesus Christ, the Cross, Rosary beads, the white dove, rainbows, and that list can go on & on but so can the equivalents in Buddhism, Buddha, mala, juzu or prayer beads, the lotus flower, the gohonzon, prayers, mantras and meditations. Both practices offer opportunities to fellowship. I point out these similarities not to sway someone one way or another about changing who or how they worship, it is to draw a comparison that many faiths operate more similarly than we may realize. I have also come to learn that many of the main faiths practiced, to include Christianity, are indeed a “combining” of other faiths. Again, this information can be readily qualified, you just gotta be open and willing to put in the effort to seek it. But something over the past few years changed. I honestly wasn’t purposely seeking a new faith to practice, I simply began to have many many questions about Christianity that as I began to do footwork, I felt out of place, disconnected. It’s a bit more in depth than that but for now this is the only way I am able to explain it at this time. This may or may not be a shock, but I came to inquire about the philosophy of Buddhism as I began my yoga journey. Now before I go any further, let me say this. There are many people who practice yoga who are Christians, however I am aware that many Christians won’t practice yoga because they feel it’s not of God. If you simply believe the masses and not take the time to actually research something you don’t know, you are choosing to remain in a place of ignorance. This isn’t to belittle anyone, but do some research before making blanket statements that clearly aren’t true. If God created EVERYTHING, what makes you think the practices of yoga doesn’t fall in that category? That is an entirely different discussion for another day but this mindset that yoga isn’t of God or something evil is completely false. And to be honest, yoga, whether I am practicing on or off my mat, is my worship. I would like to consider that God created multiple avenues of worship because we are all different. We learn differently, we understand differently, different cultures offer different behaviors of who & how we worship, etc.

An altar set up in someone’s home-Traditionally many black folks have a prayer closet in their home or a designated space for worship. With Buddhism, an altar can be made for prayer and meditation upon the Gohonzon ( this is not my personal space)

I feel like I did when I was a child being brought up in Bethel AME, being given lessons according to my age and level of understanding. And well, as I begin to dive deeper into Buddhism, nothing has really changed, other than my age & a bit more wisdom & understanding that no matter what your faith practice is, God wants us all to live a happy, peaceful, abundant life. A life of serving others, being grateful for the present moment & to forgive as quickly and often as you can. Learning to not be intolerant of others because of differences and that we are all connected. You don’t have to be a Bible scholar to have a blessed life, but it is encumbent upon us, as we grow in wisdom, that we execute what is right, that we cheerfully share our truths with the hopes of blessing and encouraging others. And that if we sit still long enough& quiet all the distractions within us, no matter your faith practice, you come to understand you are one powerful human being with the spirit of the divine within you. Everything you need to live a peaceful and blessed life is already inside you & no matter your vehicle, we are all striving to arrive at the same destination, and that is to unite with the Divine.

There is no higher religion than human service. To work for the common good is the greatest creed.
-Albert Schweitzer